Things have been busy here at the Manor of Evil. We've been doing some work out in the yard - the moat needed to be re-dug and those alligators needed a dental. Things are getting back into shape, and it's lovely to sit out back and look at the lovely view. Especially when the Venus Fly Traps are hard at work. Their little smacking sounds can be quite soothing in the twilight.

We have a bat house to put up, but I still haven't found a location that I really like for it. I do have bird houses up, and feed in the feeders. The alligators do need a snack.

I've also been doing my duty and getting on the treadmill every day. Well, almost every day. At least 5 days a week, which for an exercise hater is pretty good. We've even gone to the park a couple of days and walked there. And with some SPF 10,000, I managed not to fry to a crisp.

Thank goodness The Minion seems to have gotten his father's skin tone.

The Furry Minions have loved frolicking in the back yard since we've had such nice weather. Of course, that means we have to listen to Rhubie's incessant gnawing on her feet since she's allergic to grass. And Jerry just licks all the time anyway. It's enough to make my eye twitch sometimes. I've even threatened to put a muzzle on him. Or rip his little tongue out of his head. Which I would never ever ever do ... there's a Special Hell for people who mistreat animals. But still. Sometimes. That licking noise is just really annoying.

I'm not feeling funny today. Sorry. But the kid is still entranced by that Shake Weight commercial, so that's always good for a laugh.

The Minion is mesmerized by the Shake Weight commercial. It comes on, and he freezes, staring at the TV. Last night there was even some drool involved. I don't know what's going on with that commercial, but it's hypnotizing the toddler in this household. Which is actually quite hilarious.

Avocado Jesus


So, I must confess that I am somewhat addicted to guacamole. Not like my book addiction, but close.

See, for Christmas, The Queen Mother bought me one of those Ninja things. It's like a food processor type deal. I was sorta "meh" about it at first, but a couple of months ago, I had some smoothie stuff and decided to drag it out of the box and give it a whirl.

I made the smoothie and it was okay. But I started flipping through the little booklet and saw a recipe for guacamole. And I thought, "I could do that." So I went through my cookbooks and found a couple of other guac recipes. Then I cobbled together my own, based on the guidelines of the recipes I had found.

I threw the Minion in the car, drove to the store and bought the stuff I needed. I came home and made my first homemade guacamole. And it was so freaking good, ya'll. Like one step away from a religious experience good.

And from then on, I almost always had fresh guac in the fridge. Guacamole because my personal Saviour. I loooove it. And then I started calculating ...

I am making guac by the quart. Yes, POF does eat some. But for the most part, it's all me polishing off almost a quart of guacamole in 3-4 days. And I tabulated and figured I am eating about 3/4 cup of guac a day, on average.

And then I wondered ... how much is too much? Avocados are supposed to be really good for you. And all the produce I am using is fresh, half of it organic. Tomatoes are good for you, garlic is good for you. An entire race of people eat cilantro by the bushels, so it's got to be good for you too. I assume. They haven't died out or anything, so at the very least it isn't detrimental to your health. But is 3/4 cup of guacamole a day so much that it's bad for me?

I panicked. And I went cold turkey. For almost 3 weeks I have been guac free.

Then, today, as I pushed my cart through the produce aisle, there they were - whispering my name. So I bought the ingredients and came home to make some guacamole.

And Oh My God, How I Have Missed You, My Lovely Green Concoction.

POF was getting ready to head out the door to practice with one of his bands. And I was practically orgasmic licking the spoon. As he walked through the kitchen, I paused long enough to inform him that I was pretty sure I was emotionally cheating on him with guacamole.

His response, without missing a beat: That's okay, I've been doing the same to you with beer for years.

And that is why I love him oh so much.

Now I am counting down the minutes till dinnertime. Cause whatever I eat, it will be consumed with a side of guacamole. Oh yes it will.

Celebrating Returning From the Dead, now with a super high temperature!

Someone told me I needed to update more often. And I am trying, I swear. But lately I just don't seem to have much interesting to say. Which is distressing, trust me.

Our Easter was spent with a Minion that had a 102 temp. No church, no trip to Grandma's for lunch, nothing. Just home with some Motrin and Tylenol and a lot of rest. He was pretty pitiful and so very very hot.

But, the fever finally broke this afternoon (YAY!), so things are looking up.

Since he's still so little, I didn't really do much - not like he's gonna remember. We were grocery shopping one day and the Easter stuff was out, so we went down that aisle. I showed him ducks and bunnies and all kinds of Easter themed stuff. The only thing that even remotely interested him was a frog. So, for Easter I got him the stuffed frog he had liked.

And one of POF's friends (a dear woman who is a fan of his country band and attends most shows) bought him a rocking horse. It is adorable. It makes galloping noises and horse type noises, and it's head and tail move. Very cute. He is cautious of it, but interested.

And all I could think was Gee, thanks so much for upstaging my first Easter lady!

heh.

On a humorous note, when I brought it inside, the first thing that both dogs did was smell it's butt. If only I had the camera ready, that would have been a priceless picture. It was possibly the highlight of the day.

And now the Minion is awake and it's time to go back to Mama Duty. I promise to come back soon with something totally inappropriate.