Same meanness, new year

So .... several more months have gone by, and still I haven't written anything. I really need to make more effort. I had a total stranger tell me recently that my writing was a gift and I should use it. Hmmmm. For good or for evil? That part I didn't clarify.

What's new at the Haus of Eville? Well .... The Minion is growing like a little evil weed. He is Star Wars obsessed and knows all the characters. Our house looked like the Star Wars toy aisle exploded on Christmas morning. He's talking up a storm, saying the funniest things that keep us laughing all the time. He has these dimples that are EVIL, and he basically controls the household with his tiny dictator ways. You know, the usual.

And a new year is upon us. The final year of all years, apparently. So, since we have another apocalype approaching (years of Whedon have prepared me for just such an occurrence), I thought I might take a minute to think about the things I have learned this past year, and what evil deeds I can work on in this final year of existence.

The most significant thing I guess would be the ending of a 20+ year friendship by Facebook defriending. That was, well, interesting. I mean, for a second I felt like I was about 14 again, and that was just retarded in all kinds of ways. So, I let the friendship go. And you know what I realized? It wasn't really a friendship anymore anyway. I lost nothing from that defriending except the stress and anxiety of dealing with the friendship itself. Yay me.

I realized that basically, we'd remained friends just out of habit. Because we'd been friends since junior high (yes, back then it was junior high - middle school be damned!), and I was so deeply intertwined with her family. I love her family. And I still send her parents cards for birthdays, Mother's Day, Father's Day, etc. I saw her mom briefly right before Christmas. But that was it, and that was fine. I feel no need to justify my actions or explain my reasons. It was done, moving on, we are both better for it. I don't hate her. Never will. I just don't have a place in my life for her anymore. And truthfully, I don't fit in hers. She doesn't hang with my friends, I never even really met hers. We existed in that shared best friends in high school bubble when together, and that was basically all I had to talk about. I realized recently that she probably thought I was one of those weird people who obsessed about high school and all the people then, and where they were now. And I probably did come across that way. Because, truth is, that's all I had to talk about with her. Sad, but true. So, I had to realize that friendships don't always last forever, and it's okay to let them go.

Now, our 20 year class reunion is coming up this year. And that should make it even more intersting. Will we talk to each other? Will we be nice? Rude? Even care? Truth is, we live in the same town, and have yet to actually run into each other. In almost a year. I am sure we will eventually. And who knows, maybe we've both been at Target at the same time and just not crossed paths. Or maybe she's seen me and gone the other way. It's possible. And when we do inevitably run into each other, it will be interesting to see what happens. But I know that I don't plan to be fake about it, and I am pretty sure she won't either. So either that will mean we make eye contact, say nothing, and pretend we don't know each other, or we will say hey and move on and pretent we don't really know each other. And that's ok.

I also learned that I am one lazy person. I hate exercise. I really, really do. I forced myself into it, and after a while it became a habit, and that was good. Then sickness hit the house for a couple weeks and it all went to hell. We haven't been to the Y in over 2 months. And boy can I tell. The pants that were loose are getting snug again. I want to exercise, my body needs it. Yet, it is so damn hard to make myself get up at the crack of dawn and do it. I know that after I do it once, it will get easier. But that first time is a bitch.

I have two precious pups that are getting old. My sweet boy has a heart condition, so we've known for some time that that makes his time morelimited. But now he's starting kidney failure. Granted, lots of animals can live for years before total kidney failure takes them. But still. It's hard to know when is the right time. Right now he's relatively healthy, we are giving him special food that he loves, and he's on all kids of supplements. But eventually, things won't be so positive and we've got tough decisions to make. I dread it. My baby girl isn't doing much better. She has disk problems in her back that are perpetually aggravated by her death defying jumping stunts. Plus she's almost blind now. And she has arthritis in her back legs. She hobbles. But she's otherwise healthy and seems happy. Again, it's tough to know when to say when. If it's up to me, it's never. I will have little Darth Vader dogs running around. I'm already working on the prototype for their suits.

Also, old dogs equal incontinence. Every time I turn around, one of them is peeing or pooping on something. Pee pads? They laugh at pee pads. They will drop a dinosaur sized poop right NEXT to the pee pad. And then walk through it and track it through half the house. Some days I want to scream and wring their little necks. But I clean it up. And I say a little prayer of thanks that I have had them in my life for over a decade, and ask for just a little bit more time. I love them so much. Yes, they are dogs. But they are MY dogs. And they are my babies. And I can't imagine my life

without them. So there.

(This was supposed to be a photo of a weenie

dog in a Darth Vader costume. But then I

found this. It's much more hilarious)

Family is a funny thing. I love my family. And POF's family. We are all crazy and unpredictible and unique, and I wouldn't trade them for anything. Well .... maybe a few things. But no one's offering, so I guess they stay around. I noticed the other day that we always keep things separate. My mom's side of the family, my dad's side of the family, and POF's family. This year I am toying with having a big party for the Minion's birthday. We had all POF's family here this year for the first time the for Thanksgiving and Christmas and The Minion loved having all his cousins to play with. Doing this would mean smushing my family together with his, and potentially with each other. For basically the first time. That makes me nervous.

I realize that I am very much a compartmental person. Each relationship has a compartment. Some compartments open into others, and some just do not. Ever. Maybe things will be fine, and it's just me and my worries that has kept things separate for so long. Or maybe there will be a brawl and the cops will come. It could go either way I suppose. I'm still thinking about it, still not sure. But I think it could be great if I let it. If I could control all elements. Which, of course, I can't.

It comes down to this ... if I have a big party somewhere, my mother will want to come. And if I do a big party somewhere, that means inviting my dad and that side of the family. I have not had my mother and father together in a room since ... well, since I was a kid. I try to avoid it. I don't want to experience it. But maybe that's just me, and everything would be cool. I don't know. But just thinking about it makes me kinda hyperventilate a little bit. See, last year we had two parties. One for just us (with mom's side of the family), and then one for friends and dad's side of the family. Now I'm throwing POF's family into the mix too. It's chaos. And it makes me itchy. And twitchy. Maybe I need medication.

And now it's time to wrap this up. The Minion has decided that I've spent enough time doing something that does not include, or directly benefit, him. Hopefully it won't take me another 4 months to come back. Maybe 2012: The End of the World is the year I will blog weekly. Or bi-weekly even. You never know. It will be a surpise to me too.