I'm a lefty. For the most part, I have learned to navigate the right-handed world with few difficulties. However, scissors elude me. Certain pairs just will NOT work for me.

Just tonight I was trying to cut open something and couldn't find my usual lime green handled scissors. So I grabbed the other pair from the drawer. Knowing they wouldn't work left-handed, I still tried. And tried. Feeling stupid for attempting, knowing that all I was gonna do was caress the paper softly.

Yet I switch awkwardly to my right hand and snip, snip, snip. WTF? How is that even possible.

Because we are valued cable customers, we have a free 4 day trial of Showtime. The only thing even remotely worth viewing at this point is Twilight. So I will watch it.

I admit, I read the books. I keep reading all these things about how AMAZING they were, so I figured, hey, I like a good vampire story as good as the next girl, what the heck.

I mean, once I commit to a series, I am compelled to see it through. I have stuck with Laurell K. Hamilton this whole time. And what started as a pretty cool series about a kick-ass chick vampire executioner slowly and painfully slid into a story about a former kick-ass chick who hops from one supernatural orgy to another. The last 4 books have had little plot and zero character development. Bloor Noir was pretty good, if you can get past the fact that the book starts with a multi-room threesome ... that's sole purpose was to make one of said threesome feel better. Yeah, skip the first hundred pages (she's already covered it before, trust me) and it's not bad. But the rest, well, I have basically skimmed through them and gotten the whole story in about an hour. Sad really.

So, keeping that little quirk of mine in mind, I embarked on Twilight. I will not go into what a horrid mess these books are. My one year old Minion could write better. Seriously. But I read them. I figure if the movie is half as bad as the books, then it will be a good laugh.

On what planet is a super strong, possessive, stalker boyfriend a good thing?

About the only good of that whole 4 book mess was the summary I found on Mimi Smartypants' site. Eclipse was described as "yet another 700 pages with no fucking". Yeah, that pretty much sums it up.

Not that any of this matters, since Hell has apparently frozen over with the passing of the healthcare bill, and an apocalypse is imminent. I know that there is no way to please everyone, but I can't help but wonder how different things would be if Obama was a Republican. I am almost certain that death threats against Republicans supporting his bill would be on every media outlet demanding justice, wire taps, arrests, life sentences, etc.

The fact that Republicans are basically telling the Dems to walk it off and suck it up is just disgusting. And their lack of action to quickly and loudly condemn those actions is basically a passive-agressive way of condoning it. It makes me sick. I am over politics for a while.

On a happy note, the Minion is walking now. He made it all the way across his bedroom yesterday and today without any help. And he also has a full on Spring Snotty Nose. This has required several snot sucking adventures with the aspirator thingy. Which he finds hilarous. Only my kid.